There is ONE week left until school starts. That's it! The thought gives me butterflies and makes me feel slightly nauseous.
I have so many mixed feelings about starting nursing school.. I'm nervous, since I don't know what to expect and won't be going through it with any of my friends.. I'm excited- to learn, to master, and to be able to move forward with a career I want.. I'm sad, since I will be leaving my baby girl and my 3 year old boy all day, when they're used to me being home.. I feel proud, and scared, and all sorts of things!
It brings tears to my eyes that I'll have to leave my little ones. I love them so, so much, and I hope they always know that. I do believe it's important to do something with my life.. Not that being a mother isn't; I just so often feel like I devote everything - my entire being - to that, and I'm not sure that's setting the best example. I still will devote everything I have to being a good mother, but I also want to have SOMEthing for myself. When they're older, it will be good for me to have a career.. and it will be good for them in many ways too. (Do I sound like I'm trying to convince myself? Maybe I am!)
I've been getting up earlier to get my body used to it, so I'm not dead tired the first week of school. That has been hard! I'm pretty tired throughout the day, but I also enjoy being up before everyone else & I've found time to exercise being awake so many hours! I've gotten all my books and supplies.. The only thing I don't have is my iPad, which is being repaired! (thank goodness for the extra coverage we got on it!)
Westen will be starting first grade the same day I start school, and he's all ready as well. Eric took the first week off from work, so he'll be staying home with them all. I hope he's ready, because it will for sure be a transition for all of us!
I've heard such horror stories about nursing school.. how difficult it is, etc. I think my main worry is that I just can't do it. I don't like being a failure, and I hope I won't be. Several songs and sayings help give me strength and the belief that I CAN do it, so hopefully I can just keep those in mind.
Hello out there!
9 years ago
4 comments:
I am sure that you will do great. Try and relax this last week so you are nice and energised for your first week. Leaving your babies will be hard, but you are going to be doing something that you really want to do which will make things easier. Good luck!
You can do it! I know it'll be hard to leave the little ones at home while you go to school but good for you for doing something for you. I commend you for doing both things - being a good mother and establishing a career. :)
I find the waiting to be the most difficult part of anything. I HATE not knowing what to expect.
I think what you are doing is great, and I really admire you for knowing what you want and going after it - even though you know that parts of it are going to be hard.
I am finding right now that, for me, devoting 100% of my energy to my kids may have been a mistake. Not that they didn't deserve it, but know they will both be in school all day this year and I have no idea who I am or what I want. I put myself on hold and I should not have done that.
I absolutely think that you are doing the right thing by going after what you want career-wise. I have no doubt that you are capable of handling a career and motherhood!
You will not fail! Look at all you have accomplished so far! You can definitely do it, I believe in you and you should too! xoxo
*now, not know :)
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