Westen's 5th Birthday, Blizzard!

Westen's fifth birthday was great! He got to wear a crown and be the line leader at school, and he also took treats we'd made for snack time. He came home with a birthday folder and in it, each child had drawn him a picture! I thought that was a cute idea. Lots & lots of people came for his party. We had it at our house this year and had pizza and a Batman themed cake. He got SO many nice gifts and had a blast playing with his friends. I love having people over & getting to see everybody. It's absolutely crazy to think how many toys we're going to have when we have more children, though. It's crazy with just the two of them! Westen really loved everything he got.. He got several artsy gifts, a few hex bugs, a couple air hogs, a preschool workbook, several movies, some Lego sets, and lots more. We got him a scooter, the Batman costume for his Build-A-Bear (Cubbie), and books about sharks, dinosaurs, and the planet Earth.

We spend the rest of the weekend at Fun City. I'm not sure we'll be doing that again anytime soon! Restaurant experiences are quite interesting with Aeson. There was also a new balloon game at Fun City that popped, so as soon as Westen heard that, he didn't even want to play anymore. We'd already put money on the card, so we didn't want to just waste it, but his refusal to uncover his ears and play anything made it less than enjoyable! He's had this hearing sensitivity for as long as I can remember. I think I'm going to ask the doctor about it next time we see her actually. Aeson had a fun time running back and forth, checking out the games, and 'helping' us play. We did some shopping & swimming at the hotel that evening. Westen LOVES swimming. Aeson was very hesitant! He ended up getting in the hot tub with me for a little bit but that's about all he would do!

Monday, it started snowing here. They were predicting a pretty big winter storm. Thank goodness for me, class was canceled that night. It did end up snowing a LOT. Probably the most snow I can recall ever seeing. I'm not sure what the end totals were, but I think it was over 20 inches. I'm hoping to post some pictures later this afternoon. Luckily for us, the power never went out and we had no significant ice or anything bad result from the storm! We got a couple of snow days too! We went out to play in it yesterday and Westen can lay on top of the snow without even going through! Aeson started to play but quickly had enough!

Toddlerhood must be such a hard stage! Aeson has been particularly fussy the last couple of days. I will be so happy when he can communicate more! He has no patience right now and gets frustrated so easily! Tuesday, the day the blizzard really started, was a particularly rough day for us. I left the boys in the living room watching tv to go downstairs and start laundry.. After a couple of minutes, I heard Aeson crying, so I ran upstairs to find that he turned both faucets on in the bathroom and there was standing water on the floor! I cleaned it all up, and it scared him from turning the water on for a couple days, but now he's back at it! I also accidentally broke a Corel plate that morning (didn't even know that was possible!) AND Aeson got a whole box of spaghetti out and spilled it ALL over the house. What a day!

Why we don't vaccinate...

Vaccines are such a hot topic right now. I've been meaning to post this blog entry for a looooong time.

Let me first say that I got all the vaccinations with Westen, including flu shots. I even got them myself, during pregnancy and all. I didn't think twice about it. I don't think it was until after I had Aeson, when they wanted to give him his shots at 2 months old.. despite him being a premie and despite the fact that they developmentally consider him a month younger than he actually is.. that I actually started thinking about it.

As I started doing my research, I realized that you can CHOOSE whether or not to vaccinate. There are two sides. There ARE horrible reactions in some people from vaccines. VAERS exists because of this. The governments pays tons of money every year to people harmed by them. This is non-debatable. Any vaccine insert will read not to vaccinate if this this and this... Well, at 2 months old, how do you know your child doesn't have those things? Aeson was in the minority at birth when his lungs weren't developed, he has a fairly rare syndrome that wasn't diagnosed (or even considered, as far as I know) until months after he was born... So what's to say he wouldn't be one of the ones severely damaged by vaccines??

Also, the toxins present in them.. This too is non-debatable. We're told to stay away from things like mercury and preservatives in everyday items, yet it's okay to inject us with them?

It's not a decision I can or would make for anyone else, but I CAN make it for myself and my children. I researched BOTH sides. I looked at the reactions vaccines can cause versus what the diseases looked like..I looked at other countries immunization schedules and rates of SIDS etc..I looked at NUMBERS and the chances.. I looked at what vaccines we got when we were little compared to vaccines now. I did so much reading, I felt like I was going to go crazy! Both sides appear well supported. I honestly believe it's a personal risk assessment that each person SHOULD be doing. I don't blame those who do vaccinate, because like I said, I was there. I was that person. I had no clue! I post things all the time not to convince others of my side but to get people thinking about it.. and to get people to understand on some level possibly why I made the decisions I have.

So here's some of the information I've found...

Directly from the CDC website:

"Anyone who takes a vaccine should be fully informed about both the benefits and the risks of vaccinations." ...Are they?? Were you??

"Individuals react differently to vaccines, and there is no way to predict how individuals will react to a particular vaccine."

"Approximately 30,000 VAERS reports are filed annually, with 10-15% classified as serious (resulting in permanent disability, hospitalization, life-threatening illnesses, or death."

It won't let me copy this whole table but here is a link to the vaccines and the adverse reactions they can cause, broken down into each individual one. www.hrsa.gov/vaccinecompensation/table.htm

Here is the guide to vaccine contraindications and precautions (also includes vaccine ingredients):

http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/recs/vac-admin/downloads/contraindications-guide-508.pdf

An article on the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons website http://www.aapsonline.org/newsoftheday/0027

Good question & answer page: http://www.know-vaccines.org/?page_id=350 ...Which reminds me, there is no guarantee you won't get the disease when you're vaccinated. I think that was one of the biggest things for me.. If you vaccinate, you have the risk from the vaccine and also from the disease STILL.. whereas if you don't vaccinate, you only have the risk of the disease.

An article written by a doctor about vaccines and the immune system: http://www.healthy.net/scr/article.aspx?Id=539

Here are all the statistics about 'how vaccines did not save us.' This also brings up the issue of how many vaccines kids get these days.. vaccines to things like chicken pox and rotavirus! The rotavirus one is new just since Westen. Is it just coincidence that people's health is deteriorating as they're adding more vaccines? Children today seem to have so many more problems... Granted, I know that even if vaccines are a cause, they're not the ONLY cause. But it just doesn't make sense to me that as living conditions have gotten much better and healthcare better, we're vaccinating MORE.. http://childhealthsafety.wordpress.com/graphs/

Here's a whole bunch of studies showing the immunological benefits of breastfeeding: http://www.vaccineriskawareness.com/Disease-Killing-Properties-Of-Breast-Milk

This is a long, scientific article by Dr. Russell Blaylock. If you don't want to read it all, at least scroll through and down to the conclusions at the bottom. Among other things, this was significant to me: "This may also explain the 10X increase in Alzheimer's disease in those receiving the flu vaccine 5 years in a row."

Here is an excellent article (very, very thorough) entitled "The Case Against Immunizations" by Richard Moskowitz, M. D http://www.vaclib.org/basic/caseagainst.htm

Some other info on ingredients:

Mercury (Thimerosal) is still present in some vaccines. To show why mercury in vaccines is a concern, the National Vaccine Information Centre (NVIC) points out that 200 ppb of mercury is the “level in liquid the EPA classifies as hazardous waste,” while 50,000 ppb of mercury is the “current ‘preservative’ level [of] mercury in multi-dose flu . . ., meningococcal and tetanus (7 and older) vaccines.”

Several childhood immunizations contain aluminum, which helps to make the vaccine more effective. These vaccines include the DTaP vaccination, the hepatitis B vaccination, the HPV vaccination, and the Hib vaccination, all of which are given several times to babies under twelve months. Neil Z. Miller explains that “babies who follow the CDC immunization schedule are injected with nearly 5000 mcg (5mg!) of aluminum by 18 months of age” (Aluminum in Vaccines: A Neurological Gamble, PDF file, 2009).

This should raise some alarm, as Dr. Sears notes that “aluminum can build up to toxic levels in the bloodstream, bones and brain when injected.” Miller quotes the American Academy of Pediatrics, who say aluminum can interfere “with a variety of cellular and metabolic processes in the nervous system and in other tissues.” Miller notes that the CDC, WHO and FDA are aware of concerns connected with aluminum – but ignore this hazard in vaccines.

The NVIC notes that vaccines may contain, in differing amounts depending on the vaccine, “lab altered viruses and bacteria; ... formaldehyde; ... monosodium glutamate (MSG); hydrochloric acid; hydrogen peroxide; lactose; gelatine; yeast protein; egg albumin; ... antibiotics; unidentified contaminants.” These ingredients are present in vaccines in very small quantities. However, Dr. Sears notes that formaldehyde is carcinogenic and that MSG “can affect how the brain functions” and cause nerve tissue damage when injected.

Also, most of the things vaccines are supposed to protect against are most damaging to infants under 1... yet they don't even get all the vaccines & aren't considered 'fully vaccinated' until they're over a year. Does that make sense? And vaccines aren't even started until 2 months (except for the Hep B), so they're not vaccinated at ALL when they're MOST at risk? Does that make sense??

There are posters in our doctor's office, with stories about people who were damaged by the diseases.. Yet it doesn't say if they were vaccinated (my guess is they were) and sometimes they were too young to even have the vaccinations (so did it even matter if they had them or not?). And is it really just coincidental that SIDS rates are highest at the exact times babies receive vaccines?

To me, you can't really listen to anyone that has financial interest in vaccines either.. So many people talk about Dr. Paul Offit and others.. Well, he's the one that invented the rotavirus vaccine.. Of COURSE he's going to say they're safe! Most of the studies that say vaccines are okay are funded by the vaccine manufacturers. Plus, there have never been any long-term studies on vaccines.. NO proof whatsoever that they are safe or even effective.

Dr. Mary Tocco, Dr. Sears, Dr. Mercola, and Dr. Mary Tenpenny are some doctors that have raised awareness about vaccines and they would be worth looking into if you want to read even more. Mothering.com is an excellent resource as well.

Finally, there are SO few deaths from the diseases that we vaccinate against now.. I know some people say it's because of vaccines, but I really don't think so. There are still deaths, and there's going to be from anything. Here is the number of cases and the deaths from each.. In my opinion, it is much more likely that a person would be harmed by a vaccine than contract the disease. http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/pubs/pinkbook/downloads/appendices/G/cases&deaths.pdf

There is SO, SO much more than this. Once you start looking into it, you'd be amazed how much there is. I have a really great book that also lists the number of people who get the diseases each year in the US and the numbers regarding people who have side effects from the vaccines, all as reported by the CDC. If anyone wants to borrow it, let me know! I believe it's by PlaySchool or something... I got it at the bookstore uptown.

Anyway, this is just this side of things. I fully realize people believe vaccines do prevent disease and death. I just feel that side is out there ALL the time, whereas this side is not. I honestly don't know which side is correct, and I don't think anyone can say with 100% certainty. Usually, I think both are to some degree.

vaclib.org and know-vaccines.org are websites that have great information. I've read stories from people who used to work for vaccine manufacturers.. from people whose children have been harmed by vaccines.. It's just not worth it to me at this time. I hope and I pray that Aeson doesn't contract any of the diseases.. but at the same time, I know that any of us could get those diseases as well.. and I also know that our doctors and hospitals are able to treat so many things these days.. and also at the same time, I hope and I pray that he doesn't get ANY illness, not just ones that they have vaccines for.

I personally couldn't tell someone else what to do either.. So it makes me angry when people try to tell me what to do. People in health professions often try to tell me I'm putting their children or the rest of the public at risk... If I really thought that, do you think I would be doing it? Clearly I've done the research on BOTH sides (something I would be willing to bet they HAVEN'T), and I love my children more than ANYTHING. I absolutely would not do anything to harm them. That's why I'm NOT vaccinating! And I fully understand that people believe THEY are doing what is best BY vaccinating. I don't blame them for that, nor would I try to tell them to do differently. I DO think that people should be educated on each side of the matter. I can tell you I never knew ANY of this stuff when I let Westen and myself get vaccines.

I also honestly believe it's each person's decision to make for themselves and for their children. You absolutely cannot tell someone else what to do. There is not enough conclusive evidence in my opinion. Who's to say that someone who chooses to get the vaccine wouldn't have ended up getting a disease and maybe that vaccine DID protect them... and likewise, who's to say that the ones choosing NOT to get vaccines wouldn't have a horrible reaction to them? I always want to say that to people who try to convince me to give Aeson the vaccines... What would you do.. How would you feel.. if he did suffer some horrible reaction? On the flipside, if he does contract some disease in the future, I may change my opinion.. I honestly have seen no stories whatsoever like that, though.. only stories from the other side. No matter what, there's risk and there's death- on both sides. We are 100% comfortable with our decision, and I think everybody (on either side) has to be.

I hope I've covered the main points! It gets exhausting, looking into it all. If you have further information, please give it to me! I know there's much more. I just ask people to please respect my decision and to maybe try just a little to see why we made the decision we did. Also, please don't feel the need to comment on things giving the other side or trying to convince me TO vaccinate.. I don't do that to you. I do post things from time to time about vaccines, but that's for the people who ARE interested. If you're not, ignore it! Also, as I stated, I think the pro-vaccine side is well known.. And I WANT people to look at that.. I want them to look at BOTH sides and make a decision they're comfortable with. Basically, I'm just posting this so other people know why WE don't.

Handful, Birthday prep

Oh, Aeson has been such a handful lately! He's getting 4 molars, so he has wanted to nurse basically ALLLL the time. It's driving me nuts! I'm very happy to still be nursing him but it's just how frequent it is that is getting to me.

He now knows every single thing that he's not supposed to touch.. and for a couple days, when I would tell him "no" with one thing, he'd run back and forth to each "no no," saying "no no no no no!" I'm beginning to wonder if he even knows what "no" actually means!

On a positive note, he's started cleaning up after himself! He LOVES to throw things away or put things in the sink. I think it's adorable! He's so intelligent too.. It seems like he really understands everything we say to him.

He definitely does know what "no" means when it comes to something he doesn't want too! He'll either shake his head up and down over & over or say "no!" with a quick little shake of his head. Eric thinks it's the cutest thing when he wants to nurse, because he'll sign "milk" and then sign "please" and then shake his head "yes."

We're getting ready to celebrate Westen's FIFTH birthday! I can hardly believe I have a five year old (well, tomorrow I do)! I love how every birthday reminds you of the birth experience & what that child brought to your life when they arrived. Westen's birth was awesome, and there's always something special about the first baby you bring home.

Westen's actually finally sleeping in his own bed! We moved his room around last weekend, and I think that may be why he likes it better. He's slept in his own bed before, but he's gone through periods where he wants to sleep with us and we let him. This last time, it had lasted quite a long time, and he'd cry when we'd suggest sleeping in his own bed. I was really surprised when he went to bed just fine earlier this week AND only came into our room once through the night. He's slept just fine in it since!

Earlier this week, I was out buying Westen's birthday presents and when I went to check out, I realized I couldn't find my debit card. I walked all over the store multiple times and checked the vehicle with no luck. Eric ended up having to meet me there to pay, and I canceled the card as soon as I got home. This is the second time I have lost it in just a few months! I really need to be more careful! They just called today, and a customer did find it and turn it into the desk. Since I'd already canceled it, they destroyed it, but I was really happy that it was actually found and turned in, instead of out in the world somewhere. It also made me happy.. You always think the worst when something like that happens & I was definitely worried somebody had already gotten it and was trying to use it.. but then a good person actually finds it and does the right thing! I wish we could just assume that would happen, instead of the worst!

Schooling

I ended up being more sick than I thought! I think I was just in denial and hoping it would get better on its own. I went to the doctor, and she said it had moved into my chest.. my glands were still really swollen (and the lump on my neck was in fact a lymph node).. I had fluid in my ears.. all sorts of non-fun stuff! I was put on an antibiotic, inhaler, and told to take Mucinex. I felt better within just a couple days! I'm very glad I went because of that and because the shortness of breath was a little scary! I still feel short of breath occasionally, if I really exert myself, but overall I'm back to being well again.. thank goodness! I have to say too that I *SO* enjoyed the time with only my kiddos. Most of the time, I really wish that we could afford for me to be home with only them.

Westen had a couple of issues with school lately... He hasn't been wanting to go. :-/ That always throws up a red flag for me, because I figure there has to be a reason he doesn't want to go. His teacher sent home flashcards with letters on them for him to work on, and he has absolutely not wanted to. I tried to do some fun things with them, and I've tried to work on letters with him before, but he is just NOT interested. I'm wondering now if that's why he wasn't wanting to go.

I had bad school experiences.. I loved the learning, but I hated just about everything else about it. My mom made me go anyway, and I know for a fact all of it impacted who I am now.. not so much in a positive way. She says now that she would do it differently.. and I also intend to, if it should ever come up with my kids. However, this recent issue with Westen made me realize it's much more complex than I thought! He wouldn't tell me why he didn't want to go, so I couldn't decide if he really shouldn't go or if he just didn't feel like going that day. (I didn't tell my mom at first either, though..) I ended up keeping him home one of the days, and he ended up wanting to go later! So much so that he threw a pretty big fit about it & kept asking why I wouldn't let him go! (It was too late by then, but he didn't understand that!)

I also recently read a blog post by someone who had been homeschooled and had attended school.. It was really interesting, and I wish I could find it to post the link but I can't. Anyway, I've read some about unschooling too, and it all has me questioning the whole institution.

I'm also facing this myself, since I just started school again. I do love college for the fact that it was SO much different than any other school experience I had. I was actually able to THINK and learn what I wanted to. I have also had some bad college experiences (in my first Master's program actually), though, so that plays into all of this too. I went to my first class last night, and I am looking forward to the learning and exploration... but I just don't know how I feel about GRADING and all that. Grading = Judgment. The instructor seems pretty cool, but you never know. So far, it seems much better than my previous program, so I'm hopeful!

Sick, Master's

We're sick again! After a couple days of constant nursing, Aeson came down with a fever. He'd only have it in the evening & throughout the night, and then it would disappear all day. He had a runny nose, cough, would say his throat was 'hot,' and just looked unwell. We tried EVERYTHING.. finally, straight honey helped the cough. The fever was gone for a day but then came back again, so I took him to the doctor on Friday. She said he had some virus & that his tonsils were large. He also had an ear infection, though, so since she was prescribing antibiotics anyway, she didn't test for anything else. Unfortunately, he had the same burn-like diaper rash result from that antibiotic and the next one they tried. I took him back in Monday & she said there was still fluid in his ears but they weren't infected anymore. We stopped the antibiotic all together, and we're still waiting for his bottom to heal. :( The doctor said she didn't want to label him 'allergic' to amoxicillian, because that would count a lot of things out for the rest of his life.. But she said he is very sensitive to it, so we'll just have to remind her in the future when/if he needs medications. We're hoping the sickness stays away, because if the infection comes back, she said we'll have to do something. :-/

While Aeson was going through all this, I developed a sore throat.. that turned into congestion & a cough.. that has turned into fever, body aches, headache, sinus pressure, etc. This left me with two dilemmas. First, the daycare I run. Last week, everyone chose to find other people to watch their kids every day except for the one after Aeson didn't have a fever. I felt bad enough for that.. I mean, it was a whole week! Now that I'm sick, I hated to have them all again but at the same time, I hate exposing people (especially babies) to illness. So, I tried to have them yesterday and today (well two of the three chose to find other places, so I only had 1 extra) but it was just too much. Thank goodness for my grandma, because she suggested I send the one home, send my oldest with her, and take a nap with my youngest. I tried & did sleep off and on, but I keep waking up from coughing. Which is actually why I'm up now at 12:06 a.m.! Anyway, sickness goes SO quickly through a daycare.. I've definitely found that out since having it right here in my home! I feel so bad when I have to inconvenience parents and other family members not only when one of my kids is sick but also when I am. It's not good! Plus then I'm out income too completely, which is never good! Oh, how I miss sick pay! The second dilemma was whether or not to go to the doctor. I have absolutely no insurance, which is always scary to me, and I knew a time like this would come. Thankfully, I'm not any worse to where I HAVE to go.. But I feel pretty crappy and wish I could. I called the doctor's office to find out how much it was for a visit & it's ridiculous. They just told me the visit amount.. You have no idea how much any tests, medicines, etc are going to be. I hate that we're in this position, and I was upset about it all day. I ended up choosing not to go. I just can't imagine spending that much if it's something that's just going to go away on its own. Now, of course, I'm sort of regretting that decision & thinking I'll probably end up going tomorrow. I'd like to find out what exactly is going on and hopefully get some medicine. Even with that, though, I'm not sure what I can really be on while I'm still nursing.

Westen was oh so sweet this morning before he left. Before I'd even talked to anyone or done anything much, he asked if I was still sick. I told him yes, and he said, "I'm sorry you have to watch Aeson & Addy." Aww! He is way too smart! I thought it was just wonderful that he even THOUGHT of that.. at not even 5 years old! A little later, I was sitting on the couch & he asked if I needed him to come cuddle with me!

I wonder what he's going to be when he grows up... He's been drawing SO much lately, and he's so talented. I'm sure I've talked about it before, but he's amazing for 4 years old!

Aeson's saying even more words (hurt & down were new ones today), and his newest feat is climbing on top of his changing table! I went in to find him sitting on top of it the other day, and the next day, just in the time it took me to pour a glass of orange juice, he'd climbed up it again.

I logged onto here tonight, thinking I didn't have much to write & now I have so many things, I'm jumping all around! Anyway, I was accepted into a Master's program about an hour away, and I'm starting THIS semester! I think I already have 9 hours completed, so this will just be continuing it, but it has still been a long time since I've been in school! I'm excited, and glad to have more to do.. more to read, learn, and utilize. But at the same time, I'm nervous about spending hours away from my family (especially little Aeson), the driving, and the new classroom/students/staff. I only registered for one class this semester to see how it goes.

Lastly, my dad's cousin's wife died last week after a 17 year (I think) battle with cancer. She left behind her amazingly devoted husband and two teenage daughters. She was only 45. It was such an emotional service, and it affected me so much. I can't even begin to imagine. It makes you so thankful for what you have and the loved ones you get to see every day.

Molars, Vegetables, & Healthier Living!

My littlest is getting THREE molars! I didn't even notice until he had been wanting to nurse a LOT one day, so I decided to feel in there & one is already through! The other two you can feel and see but they haven't broken through the gums yet. I can't believe it! He's getting so big. He really hasn't been cranky and has had no problems sleeping.. just wanting to nurse more, which I'm sure is for comfort or because it feels good on his sore gums. I'm pretty sure he said "aunt" and "grandma" yesterday, and he also for sure said "truck" and "eat." His vocabulary just keeps increasing! He's also getting most animal sounds correct now.. He is one smart kid!

Silly Westen... We were cutting vegetables the other night and I picked up the onion, asking if he remembered it. He said, "Yes! That burns your eyes- I'm not looking, Mom!" hahaha! I told him that it's not looking at it that does, it's the smell. :) Later, we were munching on cold veggies & he told us how much he missed broccoli! He always makes me laugh.

We're still doing well on our new year's resolutions. It's amazing how your thinking can just change. I've learned so much since being at home. Our food choices have continued to change. We've been making better choices for quite some time, but we continue learning & finding new things all the time. We've been trying to stay away (as much as we can) from preservatives, artificial coloring, nitrites, and high fructose corn syrup. There's really easy changes anyone can make.. These are some of the things we've done (besides just making more homemade foods)...

-We stopped buying lunchables or any type of pre-made meal like that at all. They're full of bad stuff & to top it off, lunchables containers are made with BPA! There's actually a different brand at Hy-Vee that is in a non-bpa container, so we do get those occasionally. Along with this, we try to buy more fresh & frozen, instead of stuff in cans or plastics.

-We buy real cheese.. not cheese product or whatever other words they use to describe something that is NOT cheese.. Same goes with butter.

-We buy meat with no nitrites or preservatives. There's a kind that is in the sandwich meat section & it stays good for a long time, so I'm not even sure what the point is! Westen loves hot dogs too, unfortunately, but luckily for us there are some made without nitrites as well!

-There are actually really good veggie chips, teddy graham-like crackers, and even fruit snacks without any of the 'bad' stuff. I'm so happy we've found them!

-We buy ketchup with no high fructose corn syrup.. There are also little packets of cookies that come with none AND we tried the Simply cookies the other night & they were SO good!

-We always, always buy 100% juice. Luckily for me, Westen always got used to me adding water, so he even ASKS for me to add water now!

I'm sure there are many other changes that I'm not remembering.. We've bought whole wheat flour, we always buy wheat products & try to buy the freshly baked stuff, we of course buy everything we can from the farmer's market. This coming year, I hope to start a garden and I also hope to get more wooden toys (shying away from all the plastics..) and more organic clothing. Clothing is one thing I had not thought of. We already cloth diaper, and we do have some organic jammies for the kids, but I saw on The Talk the other day a guy talking about all the chemicals in our clothing & how it would take years of washing every single day to even start to get rid of them. I haven't seen many options for organic clothing, but those are just some of the goals I'm working toward!

It's a new year!

This is the first year I can really remember not really wanting the year to be over. 2010 was pretty good to us! The thing I'm most, most thankful for is Aeson's bloodwork and sonograms regularly coming back normal. I hope that continues for all of 2011 and beyond, until he's done with them. I'm also so, so thankful that I was able to be home with my babies ALL year! I've now started my SECOND year doing daycare. I've learned so much over the past year.. so much about babies and so much that they really end up teaching us!

The thing that I'm most nervous about that will be coming in 2011 is Westen starting Kindergarten! It just doesn't seem possible. I really don't think I'M ready for him to be gone all day every day either. I'm trying not to worry about it too much, and hopefully it will turn out better than I'm expecting. I'm not looking forward to the change in school and classmates.. but you have to do what you have to do, I suppose!

Eric and I went out for New Year's with some of our friends.. The same ones we spend almost every new year's with! We had a good time and were happy for the time away from home. Sometimes I wish we had more time just us.. just to go out for dinner or whatever.. and Eric pointed out the other day that we've NEVER really had alone time (since Westen was already here when he came along).. BUT I just think about all the years that we will be alone in the future. It already almost makes me cry, just to think of my children being grown and out of the house!

We have 3 main New Year's resolutions this year. First is to be nicer to each other and no yelling! I don't 'yell' often, but when I do, I instantly regret it and feel horrible. I saw something on tv the other day about how we yell when we feel we aren't being heard.. So we just need to find different ways to BE heard. This happens with Westen most often, because I'll tell him things when he isn't really paying attention or whatever and then by the time I've told him several times, I'm frustrated. So, I'm going to be working harder to make sure that he's listening when I tell him something. And as for the nicer part, I think we could all use to be a little nicer to each other.. just more thoughtful, kind, etc. Second, we WILL be getting control of our budget! I want to be accountable for every penny we spend. I want to figure out our interest rates on debt and start getting those paid off better. I want to SAVE. So far, we've done really well. The last thing kind of ties into this and is something I've continually been working on.. and that is eating healthier.. finding new recipes and less eating out! We've already chosen not to eat out twice when it would have been easier TO, and I'm really proud of us for not!

Something totally unrelated... I videotaped Aeson pointing out all of his body parts and doing some of his signs, and for some reason the computer won't let me transfer it! It won't even let me open the program.. I hope I can figure it out! :-/