Always indecisive

Aeson's started signing "milk" the last couple of days, but I wasn't sure he really knew what it was until last night. He definitely wanted his momma! It's so amazing watching children grow every day.. and then every day turns into years.. and it's crazy how fast time flies. He also started trying to pull himself up yesterday! I couldn't believe it. He can get his butt up but not quite get into the standing position yet. I'm sure it will be soon! I think he's one intelligent boy. (Of course, I'm sure most parents do! :))

I hate how I have so much trouble making decisions... I contemplate everything and worry about making the 'right' decision. Unfortunately, I'm not sure my husband is much different, so it's a wonder anything gets decided around here period! :)

We took my mom to look at the house we're considering buying the other night. She loves it. That validated my own feelings, but I'm still stuck wondering if it is 'the house'.. if I will like living in that town.. etc, etc. There's so much to think about! We have no other possibilities right now, so our options are this house (and all the work it involves...) and selling our house & possibly renting until we find another house. IF we would find another house. I'm sure we would, but would we like it as much as this one? Would we regret not getting this one? Or would we find a better one and be glad we didn't get this one? Those thoughts are consuming me! And do I even want to live in this town? I've never lived there before, so I have nothing to base it on. The school is right there and there's certain things that are nice (and grandparents that are close!) but there's not a real grocery store.. no Walmart.. we'd have to travel 15 minutes (which isn't that bad).. and while it's closer to Eric's friends, it's further from mine. Hmmm...!

We have been countering offers back and forth all week. They came down a significant amount and have remained at that. We have gone up quite a bit from our original offer and just offered a difference of 5,000 today. We'll see what they do. I still don't expect them to budge.

The other thing that's driving me CRAZY is that we have to get our house ready to put on the market.. Things need touched up, the yard needs cleaned and made to look pretty, our garage needs repained.. But it is darn near impossible to get much done when you run a daycare and have two small children yourself and your husband doesn't get home from the work day until 7pm and works Saturdays. We HAVE to get it ready SOON so we don't lose this house (if it is the one we want!). Ahhh.. why am I so indecisive?!

Well, let me answer that.. because buying a house is a big deal. It's not like we'll want to move again in a few years. We could, I know, but we need to decide where we want to be by the time the kids start school. I don't want them to go through so many changes. It's hard enough leaving the home I brought both Westen and Aeson home from the hospital to!

Everyone says all will work out as it should... but that still doesn't leave us completely powerless and doesn't take away from the decision-making that still needs to be done now!