Valentine's, Induction Option

Valentine's Day was earlier this week. Eric had to work open to close, so I mostly spent it with the kids! With everything going on, I kind of forgot about it until last minute, so we didn't do anything too elaborate. I cut toast into hearts for breakfast, and we made a heart-shaped homemade pizza together for dinner. Aeson & I did get to take lunch to Eric, and he gave me a dozen pretty roses when we met him. I really think Valentine's Day is mostly a waste of money, but it does make you think about those who are special to you too. Oh, and I got to hear "Happy Valentime's, Mommy" all day long. :)

I had my 38 week doctor's appointment on Wednesday, and I'm super glad Eric was able to go with me. I'd gained TWO pounds this week! I think I'm putting on weight faster now than I have the whole pregnancy! My blood pressure and all that were still good. I was still only dilated to a 1. The doctor said he was going to come back to talk to us, and I got nervous! When he came back, he said he has absolutely no problem doing VBAC's, but the hospital does because it costs them more money to call in surgery and have them there the whole time - when it happens after hours. So, he said THEY wanted him to ask if I would consider being induced, so it would happen during the day when they're already there and if so, they would do it on Tuesday at 6 a.m. He said not to decide then, but he wanted to see me on Monday and I could let him know then. He did also mention briefly concern about the baby getting bigger and why she's not dropping down (he really thought I would have her by now).. If she can't for some reason, we won't know that until we try to have her.

I was disappointed when we left.. I really didn't want to be faced with such a decision. Part of me thought it'd be great to just have her here, and it would make lots of things easier to plan if we knew when it was going to happen.. But, our midwife that we left only because the hospital refuses to allow VBAC's had always said one of the three big no-no's with VBAC's is induction. I also knew that the doctor my sister is going to (also hoping for a VBAC) will absolutely not induce VBAC's, and I've read countless studies that it increases your risk for rupture. I had brought this up to our doctor, but he said he doesn't believe it does. He has had 3 ruptures occur - One occurred before the woman got to the hospital.. He made it seem like she possibly wasn't even a patient of his & said she had not told anyone she was having contractions, etc. Anyway, she was pregnant with twins, one died, they worked hard to save her, and the other baby ended up dying 6 months later. The other two ruptures were small holes they caught in labor, though, and the moms and babies were fine. I didn't ask if they had been induced, but he did say he has regularly induced VBAC's.

Making the decision bothered me a lot that night. I didn't sleep well and kept imagining the worst. I was, and still am, afraid that if I refuse, I may not be able to have a VBAC at all & it's too late to find a different doctor now.. and also that c-section will be pushed for.

By the next day, I felt like there was no way I could do it. My body is showing no signs of labor yet. When I was given pitocin with Westen, I had had signs for weeks and my water had broken, so I feel like he and I were ready. I don't feel like that's the case with this pregnancy. There's varying studies about the increased chance of rupture, but my main reason for not is simply because I think it's better that my body go into labor on its own - both for me and for the baby.

I also called our midwife and left a message with the nurse. I wasn't sure if she would tell me her advice since I'm no longer a patient of hers, but she actually called me back herself just a couple of hours later & we ended up talking for like ten minutes! She said she would absolutely not, under any circumstances, induce a VBAC, especially at 39 weeks. She said a lot more, and I told her we trusted her opinion over anyone else's. I'd figured that's what she would say, but it was good to talk to her about it. Her recommendation was to go for a VBAC if I go into labor on my own, not induce, do a sonogram at 41 weeks to look at fluid and things if I make it that far, and then if everything still looks okay, not to do anything until 42 weeks, when they would do a repeat c-section if I still have not gone into labor.

So, that's what we're going with. That's what we feel comfortable with, and we will be telling him on Monday. I'm hoping he takes it well. It makes me so nervous! I just can't do something I don't feel comfortable doing, though. I trust my body, and my baby to come when she's ready. And if she doesn't, I think I will feel much more comfortable with the possibility of a repeat c-section at 41 weeks plus. Please cross your fingers the doctor is okay with this.. or more so, the hospital.

Since then, I've gotten actually kind of angry that they would even present this.. Why make things harder on me and the baby and force something just because it's more convenient for you? Or costs you less money? It's very frustrating. I'm so thankful to have Eric and my doula for support.

Also since then, I've tried just about everything to start labor! I was hoping if I went before Monday, I wouldn't have to make the decision or face him with it. I honestly didn't (and still don't) see that happening, though. When he said Tuesday, I felt like even then it just wasn't time yet. Anyway, I've tried pineapple (tons and tons of it!), onion rings (a local story), caffeine, walks, squats/duck walking, and evening primrose oil capsules. It does seem I've had more and a little stronger contractions than I was having, but that's about it.

I also remembered that I couldn't even remember my exact dates and my first doctor had wanted to move back the due date by a couple of days. I know it's not that much of a difference, but still I may not be quite as far along as I think I am. I keep reminding myself too that even though I went early with Westen, most people go right around their due date. And who knows how long I would have gone with Aeson.

So anyway, I'm feeling really pretty good, and I'm 100% sure about our plan.. I just hope the doctor allows that to be our plan.