Anxiety

The daycare is going much better. I've become more used to everything and so have the kids, I think. We've had snow days every week, I think, so that always throws it off a bit! Everything seems to be in transition right now, though, and it feels odd.

I love being home.. LOVE LOVE LOVE spending every minute with my kids. Not having to get out in the cold. Being with my husband more. Etc etc. I've been wondering lately how long I will do it, though. I started out thinking maybe I'd join the workforce after I have one more baby and get to spend time with it.. but that seems awfully far away. Maybe it won't seem like it then. I have no idea how you choose to have another baby, and I'm not sure when I'll be ready for that. Daycare's such a weird thing too b/c it's not always constant, you know.. The kids get older and they go to school and you have to find new ones. In the end too, I still have no idea what I want to DO with my life. I was pursuing the counseling field and have all my experience in that.. but I don't think it's something I want to do my whole life. Maybe. But at this point, I'm not feeling it! I don't miss it AT ALL! I have no idea what else to do, though.. I know some things I'm interested in, but I don't want to go into more debt to 'see' if I like them! Ahh.. it's hard. I'm such a planner.. I need to work on being happier in the present and not worrying so about all that.

Eric's sort of in the same position, though. His hours have been cut lately, which leaves us stressed financially and I suppose is what brings up all these thoughts! He has been applying for jobs pretty much our entire relationship and has never gotten a good one. I have no idea why. He's very intelligent and presentable. He needs a full-time job badly.. but at the same time, I will miss having him at home with me.. and especially the help he provides with the daycare! I do hope he finds something, though, and soon. He's thought about returning to school as well but isn't sure what he wants to do either.

This is turning into rather a 'down' post.. but I am also having lots of difficulty with eating! Being home with all the kids has made me snack so much more! Plus it's winter and we're stuck inside all day. I want to lose weight sooo bad.. I've started exercising each night, but I'm not sure it's enough. At least I have time for it now, though- unlike before!

Westen's fourth birthday party was this past weekend. He had SO much fun! He wore his party hat from the time he woke up that morning and asked all day if it was time for his party. He looked so bashful when we all sang to him. This is the first year that I think he's REALLY understanding things. Although I don't think he quite understood that it was just his PARTY day, not his actual birthday (which is in two days). Lots of people came and he got a ton of cool gifts. We got him some artsy stuff and a puppet, all of which he has already used and loves! He's been learning how to draw letters and numbers. He's SUCH a good little artist too! He spends most of his days drawing. I'm currently trying to decide if I'll send him to school this fall or not. It would be PreK. I'm sure all you other moms know how I'm feeling about it! I looked at the readiness for kindergarten list and he can ALREADY do all of that stuff... so it's not that he needs it at all for that. And I'm planning on getting him into some sports this summer at the Y.. So I don't know if he needs to be in school all day every day. There's also a school dilemma. We only have one public school, and I'm not too crazy about him attending there. There's a small baptist one that only goes through grade school and there's a Catholic one that is an AWESOME school, but I'm not too sure about the religion part, I don't know if we could even get in, and it's costly (although I don't know how much). I should probably take time to learn more, but I am so busy during the day with the daycare. It's hard to do much of anything during 'business' hours!

Aeson's getting SO big. He's in 12 month clothes. I've become increasingly worried about his size the bigger he's gotten. I worry about his breathing.. his ability to do things because of the extra weight.. his uncomfortableness.. and him being made fun of as a child. Hopefully he won't, as he should be grown 'out' of it and to 'normal' size by the time kids get around to doing those things.. but it's still a worry. I worry way too much lately! Acey's been getting cuter and cuter, though, and he's become such a better baby since I've been home. He'll play on his own for quite a while and has even fallen asleep in his crib by himself with NO crying for the last several days! (during naptime only :).. We haven't tried at night yet) He wants to do so much more than he's able to. He likes to sit with our assistance and he's always reaching for and playing with toys now. He very much enjoys his exersaucer! His little laughs are my favorite. They don't happen too often.. usually only if you tickle him (he's very ticklish!) or if something new is funny- After a time or two, he no longer thinks it's funny!

I'm trying to treasure these moments. It's different for baby's first year, because HE is my purpose.. It's almost like everything I do is for him. Eventually I'll get a part of 'my' life back, but right now, I'm enjoying being his everything. :) I know I won't ever have a chance to be that again, not for him anyway. Westen's already getting so big and showing me just how fast they grow up!

The beginning of the daycare

So sorry I have been MIA! I've been reading via my phone, but I was so busy and then our Internet wasn't working.. and I didn't even want to try to update via my phone! Even commenting was too hard on there.

Anyway, the week before last, I was extremely busy getting things ready to start the in-home daycare. On Christmas Eve, I got a call from the mommy who had visited, asking me to secure a spot for her 8 month old. I then let my friend who had also been interested know, and she also secured a spot for her 2.5 year old. That left me full! It also left me only a week at my job! (Mom of the 8 mo old is a teacher and returned to work on the 4th)

Also on Christmas Eve night, after being in labor for a couple of days and pushing for hours with no result, my SIL and BIL had their first baby via C-section. Nobody knew the sex, and it was a GIRL! They named her Addyson Grace, and she will be called Addy. Come March 1, I will also be watching this sweet girl. :)


Christmas was different this year. My mom ended up canceling Christmas at her house (drama I don't want to go into!). Then, with the birth of Addy, Christmas with Eric's family was rescheduled. We spent Christmas Eve at my dad's house and then the hospital.. and then up quite late playing Santa's elves! Westen loved Christmas this year, and it was a lot of fun watching him enjoy it. We did make our first ever Christmas meal (complete with homemade noodles!) and had that with my sister and BIL. While it was different, it actually ended up being enjoyable. We had our Christmas with Eric's family the next week, and we got sooo many nice things!

For New Year's, my in-laws came in to watch the kids. We were going to have them stay there overnight, but we all decided together that none of us were quite ready for that! (Mostly, we agreed Aeson wouldn't be ready for it and were all concerned about that.. me especially!) We went to a party with my coworkers and then to the same bar we went to last year. Eric's brother's band played. Sometime hopefully I'll have time for a New Year's entry.. lord knows this past year was CRAZY!

Last Saturday, right after working my last day at work, Eric found out his hours had been cut at work. (Well, everyone's had.. not just his) I was worried at first but then thought.. maybe this is God's way of providing help I'll need this week! And boy did I.

Both parents decided to start their kids on the 4th. That Monday was the hardest ever! The 8 month old is actually a bit smaller than Aeson (now 5 months!!).. he can do a few more things (sit up, almost crawl).. but they're alike in a lot of ways. Both are breastfeeding, co-sleeping (I think) babies and it's hard to have a baby like that away from their mama. I've found out that Aeson is SO much happier since I've been home. He'll lay on the floor or play in his exer-saucer for hours now.. He would NEVER do that before. He's also sleeping easier and more.. It is SO wonderful. He's no longer that very needy baby he seemed to be before. However, the other baby is! He wants held a LOT and while I try to do it as much as possible (my body was more sore than it had been in a LOOONG time from caring for four children.. and two 20+ pound babies!), it's hard to do when I have other children to care for. The older two boys entertain themselves and play together very well, but I also do activities, learning exercises, and reading with them every day. It was so hard to fit it all in, divide my attention, and give everyone their needed attention.. even with Eric here! With the addition of less sleep than usual the night before and irritating news from work, I was about in tears by the end of the day. I couldn't even imagine doing it without Eric.

Each day did get easier.. but still a struggle.. and I even did it on my own on Wednesday. Any tips from other moms would be GREATLY appreciated. Thursday and Friday ended up being snow days, so we had no kids! We got to spend it with Eric on Thursday and played in the snow with Westen. Friday and Saturday Eric worked, and we got quite bored! I'm afraid we will have to start all over with the kids and the routine tomorrow.. We'll see how it goes! I just want to be able to provide for everyone's needs and have them all happy. AND I'll be adding a two month old into the mix March 1!

It's sort of scary starting your own business. You never know what will happen. The 8 month old won't attend all summer either since his momma will be home.. so I'll have to try to find more kids just for the summer or make do with less money (which I'm not sure is possible). I do love being home, though. I worry a bit about Westen getting too bored.. It will be nice when we can go outside.. but he will probably start preschool in the fall too.. maybe. :) Aeson's happier, though, and my house stays cleaner.. I have more time for all those things.

Prayers (and advice!) would be MUCH appreciated!!

Just some updates

Still no more kiddos signed up. I'm hoping & praying for it to happen SOON. Today's Monday, and it's been a rough one. I miss the kids SO much. I want to be home so badly it hurts! Tears stung my eyes more than once this morning.

We went to the geneticist in St. Louis last Thursday, and I posted the results in a note on facebook. It went very, very well! We were so happy to be able to talk to people who have seen LOTS of children with BWS.. and to hear that his cancer risk is very low and to hear the explanation behind the genetics AND how it would be very rare for us to have another baby with it (like less than 1%). I feel bad for my poor little Aeson having it.. but hopefully it will never result in any tumors.. and all of this mess and his characteristics will be GONE by the time he's 4-8.

Friday, Aeson had his 4 month checkup. He actually met all the 4 month milestones, although she said she wouldn't consider him four months until he would actually gestationally be four months (January 3rd). She voiced a little more on her position with vaccinations, making me feel pretty bad for NOT getting them. Thing is, though, if I did get them, I know I would regret it.. just as I do with Westen and the couple Aeson's already had. But I wish I didn't have to hear it. :( It would be nice if there were more doctors against them! Aeson weighs 19 pounds now and is 27 inches long, I think it was. Very, very big for his age. In the 80's and 90's but not off the chart quite yet!

Saturday, Westen and I baked more cookies! Then Sunday, we had Eric's father's side of the family's Christmas. Last Thursday was our volunteer party at work too.. So I have had waaay too much food this last week! As of last Tuesday, I'd lost 6 pounds in the prior four weeks.. but I think I'll probably gain this week darnit! :( We had a wonderful time at Eric's family's, though. Westen got a Transformer and then bought a few more with the money he got.. He's obsessed with them! He even talks like them, which is quite cute. Aeson also apparently laughed out loud last Thursday and I missed it! :( I was at the volunteer party, and he hasn't done it since!

A friend of mine is having trouble nursing her baby who is the same age as Aeson (3 days apart, I think). She's not producing enough, and he's having a horrible reaction to formula's they try.. So I'm giving her most of our frozen supply later this week and now trying to pump extra for her. I normally feed Aeson before leaving in the morning, go home late morning to feed him, he gets a bottle & I pump in the early afternoon, and then I feed him when I get home at 4. Soo.. This morning, I tried pumping immediately after I got to work (minutes after he stopped eating) and easily got 5oz. BUT I'm afraid he didn't get enough now at his late morning feeding.. Eric said he was super fussy just a bit ago. We'll see how it works out.. I hope I can help. I was having problems with oversupply, though, and actually had to start feeding him on one side for two feedings in a row at night because he would start choking and having major problems eating.. So I'm kind of worried that pumping will increase my supply and that will start again! I have an LLL meeting tonight, so we'll see if I get any other tips.

Aeson's doctor also said we could start him on solids when he "would be" four months.. so that would be January 3rd. I'm hoping that helps him not be so needy and wanting to eat so often! Poor little thing.. I mean, he's as big as a 9-12 month old!

Daycare; Christmas-time with kids

Does anyone know of any legitimate money-making things online or otherwise that you can do from home??

Now that I've told my boss, I can spill the beans here! I'm working on becoming licensed to do in-home daycare. I'm only one home inspection away actually. Problem is.. I can't find the kids! Yet anyway. I have several friends who have done or are doing it as well and they say I'll definitely get them.. sometimes it just takes a while. How long is what I'm not sure of! I've let the world of facebook know and I've put an ad online but nothing yet. :( I have one spot filled and that's going to be my niece/nephew who is due at the end of this month.. so I won't be watching him/her until the end of February/beginning of March. I want two more kids. I'm going to be putting an ad in the paper soon.. hopefully that will help. I was planning on starting in January, but now I'm not sure if I'll be able to. I can't go without a paycheck in between jobs either, so it's sort of crazy trying to plan it all out!

And.. since our moms can't continue to watch the boys past January.. I have two options-- See if I can go part-time at work until I find kiddos OR go ahead and quit and well, I guess that's not an option unless I'm making money somehow!!

Hopefully things will work out. Soon. I can't wait to be home with my boys.

We've been having SO much fun. Last week, we watched Christmas specials (like Rudolph) on TV. Westen LOVED it. We made Christmas cookies over the weekend.. Westen helping with the dough and then finishing off the decorating at the end (by putting TONS of sprinkles on them :)). We also went to see Santa on Saturday. Westen was a little scared before going, saying that he was not going to sit on his lap and asking if it was loud when he says 'ho ho ho.' However, when we got there, Santa held out his arms and Westen climbed right up! And then proceeded to talk and talk and talk! He told him all about the Transformers and Batman things he wants. Santa told him to leave cookies for him, something I had not told Westen yet about, so he's been quite intrigued with that idea since. It also snowed for the first time here and Westen was SO excited when he saw it. He thought that it meant Santa was coming! :) He went outside before I even left for work that morning to play in it. I can't wait until I can play with him in it! We also took some cute pictures (posted on facebook) of the boys to use for Christmas cards.. which I need to get done!! Speaking of, if I don't have your address, send me a message with it so I can get one to you! We're supposed to have our first big winter storm here tonight. I love it!

Thanksgiving 2009

What a busy extended weekend!

First, I'll update you on the BWS. I was quite upset the first few days after the diagnosis, understandably, but now that the reality has set in, I'm somewhat better. The constant testing is still killing me, but maybe that will get better too. He had his first sonogram last Friday. They said the doc should have the results by Monday, but she did not at the time of our appointment and we haven't heard anything since. He had to get blood and urine taken Monday. Taking the blood was an AWFUL experience. The doctor tried for over forty five minutes.. sticking him in both his wrists and arms.. He screamed the entire time and she still didn't get ANY blood. It was horrible. I had taken a sheet in I got off the BWS website about how they should just be able to do a fingerpoke, so she said she would check with the lab. The next day I heard from the nurse and she said they CAN do the fingerpoke! Thank GOD!! That will be so much easier and less traumatic. His urine sample came back good too! AND, they got us in with a geneticist in St. Louis on December 10! It was a good news day. We have to drive further than we would have had to to go to the June appointment, but it's worth it!

Aeson has definitely showed that he's growing waaay more than the average baby. He's in 6-9 month clothes now and even wore a 12 month outfit the other day. He won't be four months until Dec 3. It's no wonder he wants to eat all the time. I'm just thankful that my milk has been enough for him. He still wakes 1-2 times a night, but it doesn't bother me. He never naps very long during the day.. usually only for a half hour at a time! That's kind of hard, because I don't have much time to get things done around the house but I know that won't last forever.

I also weighed myself this last week and had lost 4lbs in the last two weeks! Which actually puts me just below my weight when I found out I was pregnant. It certainly doesn't feel like it.. I suppose it's just distributed differently now. I'm hoping to continue losing.

So on to our weekend...

I was so thankful for a shorter work week. Wednesday evening, Eric and I watched Four Christmases. It was a lovely start to the Thanksgiving weekend. Thursday, I made biscuits and gravy for breakfast, and we watched Funny People (which was way too long). We went to Eric's parents for a late lunch and had all the Thanksgiving fixings. It was delicious and Aeson actually slept for most of the meal. After dessert, we watched the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving and National Lampoon's Christmas vacation. We had a very, very good time with his family. The four of us stayed the night there, so Eric and I could leave early for Black Friday shopping! It was our first year going. We got up around 4am and headed out after Aeson ate. Unfortunately, since we were up, Aeson decided he wanted to be too, so Eric's mom didn't get to go back to sleep!

Anyway, Eric and I had an awesome time shopping. We went to Toys R Us first and got Westen done! I'm excited about the gifts we got him this year. It was super fun picking them out together too and getting such good deals! We then shopped for other family members at the mall and surrounding stores, ate lunch out, and then headed back to his parents. We spent some more time there before heading home to shop just a bit more, eat dinner at home, and then get out our Christmas tree! I was SO upset to find out that all of our Christmas tree decorations were ruined. We'd put them in an area of the basement that doesn't usually get wet.. only this year, with all the rain, it did. We hadn't even thought about it until we went down to get them. It's a big mess we need to clean up now. Ugh! I suppose that will teach me to put them in a watertight container next time. We made a run to Kmart to get some decorations, only we didn't have much money after the day's shopping! We got what we could and finished decorating (while listening to Christmas music :)) when we got home. Westen loved helping, and he also loved helping me wrap some of the presents afterward.

I can't believe I wasn't more exhausted by the end of the day yesterday. It was a good, fun day though.

Now we're up to today.. We have Thanksgiving dinner at my mom's tonight and I have a baby shower to go to tomorrow. Plus Sunday is always our clean house/do laundry/etc day, before heading back to a full work week Monday. Boo! :(

Diagnosis

I've been reading a bit, but I've been so, so busy and haven't yet been able to comment.. I haven't forgotten all of you! And I will be blogging away about lots of stuff pretty soon. But, for now, I just wanted to post this- now that Aeson has indeed been diagnosed with it. He has the difference in the chromosome and will now undergo blood/urine tests and sonograms regularly for all of his childhood.. starting this Friday. I can't write all my thoughts/feelings right now.. but just, as you read this, imagine it was your child.

What is Beckwith-Wiedemann syndrome?

Beckwith-Wiedemann syndrome (BWS) is a growth regulation disorder. The most common features of BWS include macrosomia (large body size), macroglossia (large tongue), abdominal wall defects, an increased risk for childhood tumors, kidney abnormalities, hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) in the newborn period, and unusual ear creases or pits. Children with BWS may also have hemihyperplasia, in which some parts of the body are larger on one side than on the other.

The major features of BWS, macrosomia and macroglossia, are often present at birth. Abdominal wall defects such as omphalocele, which causes the inside of the abdomen to protrude through the navel, are also present at birth and may require surgery before an infant leaves the hospital. Mothers of children with BWS may have pregnancy complications, including premature delivery and polyhydramnios (excess amniotic fluid). An unusually large placenta and long umbilical cord may also be present.

The increased growth rate generally slows during childhood. Intellectual development is usually normal, and adults with BWS typically do not experience any medical problems related to their condition.

What causes BWS?

BWS is a genetic condition related to changes in the genes (in an area called the short arm) of chromosome 11 (11p15.5). In most cases (about 85%), the genetic changes that cause BWS happen sporadically (occurs by chance) in families where there is no history of the condition. In about 10% to 15 % of cases, the genetic changes may be inherited. This means that the risk for BWS can be passed from generation to generation in a family. The genetic mechanisms that cause gene mutations (alterations) resulting in BWS are complex.

How is BWS inherited?

The 10% to 15% of BWS that is inherited follows an autosomal dominant inheritance pattern. Normally, every cell has two copies of each gene: one inherited from the mother and one inherited from the father. In autosomal dominant inheritance, a mutation happens in only one copy of the gene. This means that a parent with a gene mutation may pass along a copy of their normal gene or a copy of the gene with the mutation. Therefore, a child who has a parent with a mutation has a 50% chance of inheriting that mutation. A brother, sister, or parent of a person who has a mutation also has a 50% chance of having the same mutation.

How common is BWS?

BWS has been found across different population groups. Approximately one in 13,700 people have BWS. Some researchers believe this number could be an underestimate.

How is BWS diagnosed?

The diagnosis of BWS is clinical, meaning that it is based primarily on physical features. BWS is suspected in children who are larger than expected for their age, especially if growth is not symmetrical (the same on both sides). An enlarged tongue and abdominal wall defect, primarily omphalocele, are also considered to be common features. There are many other features that may be seen in some children with BWS. However, not every child with BWS will have every feature. Features are listed as major (common) or minor (less common). It is generally agreed that at least one major feature and two minor features are required to consider a diagnosis of BWS:

Major Features

* Macrosomia (large body size)

* Macroglossia (large tongue)

* Omphalocele (abdomen protrudes through navel)

* Hemihyperplasia (some parts of the body are larger on one side)

* Ear creases or pits

* Visceromegaly (enlargement of one or more abdominal organ)

* Embryonal tumor (Wilms tumor, hepatoblastoma, neuroblastoma, rhabdomyosarcoma)

* Adrenocortical tumor

* Kidney abnormalities

* Cleft palate (gap in the roof of the mouth)

* Family history of BWS

Minor Features

* Polyhydramnios (excessive amniotic fluid)

* Prematurity (low birth weight)

* Hypoglycemia (low blood sugar)

* Advanced bone age

* Heart problems

* Diastatsis recti (separation of the right and left sides of the main abdominal muscle)

* Hemangioma (noncancerous tumor made up of blood vessels)

* Facial nevus flammeus (hemangioma of the skin, also called a “port-wine stain”)

* Characteristic facial features

* Identical twins

Genetic testing for gene mutations associated with BWS is available, but is complex. It is recommended that families considering genetic testing for BWS meet with a clinical geneticist and genetic counselor that can explain the tests and coordinate testing. Currently available genetic testing methods may be able to identify up to 80% of genetic mutations causing BWS.

What are the estimated cancer risks associated with BWS?

The estimated risk for tumors in children with BWS is about 7.5%. Tumors are very rare after age 10, and the risk for an individual tumor decreases over time until the risk is similar to that of the general population. Several different tumor types, both cancerous and benign (noncancerous), have been reported in children with BWS. The most common tumor types are:

* Wilms tumor (kidney tumor)

* Hepatoblastoma (liver tumor)

* Adrenocortical carcinoma

* Neuroblastoma

* Rhabdomyosarcoma

What are the screening options for BWS?

Current suggested screenings for people who are known or suspected to have BWS include:

* Baseline magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) or computed tomography (CT or CAT) scan of the abdomen, at the time of diagnosis

* Abdominal ultrasound to view kidneys, liver and adrenal gland every three months, until age 8

* Serum alpha-fetoprotein every three months, until age 4

* Regular physical examination, including abdominal exam; schedule determined by your doctor


Most children (>80%) with BWS do not develop cancer; however, children with BWS are much more likely (~600 times more) than other children to develop certain childhood cancers, particularly Wilms' tumor (nephroblastoma) and hepatoblastoma.[1] Individuals with BWS appear to only be at increased risk for cancer during childhood (especially before age four) and do not have an increased risk of developing cancer in adulthood.[1] If 100 children with BWS were followed from birth until age ten, about 10 cases of cancer would be expected in the group before age four, and about 1 case of cancer in the group would be expected between age four and ten.

In addition to Wilms tumor and hepatoblastoma, children with BWS are also at increased risk of developing adrenal cortical carcinoma, neuroblastoma, and rhabdomyosarcoma.

Both Wilms tumor and hepatoblastoma can usually be cured if diagnosed early. Early diagnosis allows physicians to treat the cancer when it is low stage. In addition, there is less toxic treatment.[9] Given the importance of early diagnosis, all children with BWS should receive cancer screening.

In general, the prognosis is very good. Children with BWS usually do very well and grow up to become the heights expected based on their parents heights. While children with BWS are at increased risk of childhood cancer, most children with BWS do not develop cancer and the vast majority of children who do develop cancer can be treated successfully.

Children with BWS for the most part had no significant delays when compared to their siblings. However, some children with BWS do have speech problems that could be related to macroglossia or hearing loss.

Advances in treating neonatal complications and premature infants in the last twenty years have significantly improved the true infant mortality rate associated with BWS. In a review of pregnancies that resulted in 304 children with BWS, not a single neonatal death was reported.[11] This is compared to a previously reported mortality rate of 20%.[12] The data from the former study was derived from a BWS registry, a database that may be slightly biased towards involving living children; however, death was not an exclusion criterion to join the registry. This suggests that while infants with BWS are likely to have a higher than normal infant mortality risk, it may not be as high as 20%.

Halloween and birthday

Well, Aeson's bloodwork is now being sorted through and inspected, or whatever it is they do, to test it for the syndrome I talked about before. Doctor wasn't sure how long it will take.. which I found kind of odd.. but expected it to be a couple of weeks. They had a hard time getting the blood and it was a terrible experience. But much better to know, right?

Halloween was awesome this year! Westen had his party at school and he was sooo excited. I went for a little bit and took some pictures. When he had his costume on, he became Optimus Prime.. No one was to call him Westen.. and he did the same with everyone else in costumes! It was quite funny because he would even do it walking along the streets during trick-or-treating. He'd yell out 'Hi Batman!' etc. He was very much 'into' Halloween this year. We went to the small town I grew up in the first night and then the town we live in now the second. He LOVED walking along the streets (the weather was actually not too bad.. but quite windy!), ringing doorbells and saying 'trick or treat!,' and then saying 'thank you!' and scurrying to the next house. It was so much fun. I don't think there's anything better or more fun than to see your children happy/having fun.

My birthday was yesterday. I turned twenty six! I feel so old!! :) This was the first year that I actually was NOT really excited about it.. I feel like from this point on, I'm only going to get OLD. I've been so darn busy too that I felt I wasn't really able to ENJOY things lately. I forgot to mention when I was writing before about how busy I am that Eric also works Saturdays.. so yet another busy day for me and only one day that we actually get together. I'm getting so burnt out on working and doing it all.. It's so hard and all I really want to do is be home with my family.

Anyway, back to my birthday.. I got lots of nice cards and I got the day off of work. I was rather taken aback when my boss asked me what I was doing and asked if the kids were still going to daycare so I could have some time to myself. I WANT my free time to be with them! I hadn't even CONSIDERED not spending the day with them. So that's what we did.. just spent the day together and Aeson was actually pretty fussy! We got to spend part of the day with my mother-in-law, though, so that was fun. Then we spent the evening with my family, eating dinner and cake that I baked. :) Birthdays just aren't what they were when you were younger! Tonight, we're going to dinner with a few of our friends and I'm very excited about that. Hopefully it'll be a good time!

Something funny this week.. I had someone tell me the bag that holds my pump etc was a nice lunch bag.. I just kept my mouth shut. :) haha.